Ladies, let’s talk about hair. Let’s talk about the power other people feel they have over how we cut it, color it, style it. You know what I’m talking about.
I’ve been told to “never dye my beautiful blonde hair, because that would be a shame” and that I “used to be so beautiful with long hair” and that people “aren’t sure whether or not I like boys anymore” because of my short hair.
I’ve been questioned about what my husband thinks about my hair (as in: you should wear it how he tells you to wear it.) I'm grateful that my husband is supportive of whatever I choose to do with my hair, but unfortunately many men I deal with regularly are not.
I’ve been told that I’m more or less of a woman based on the length of my hair, or whether or not I choose to cut it based on what the men in my life will think of it.
The real reason I cut my hair
Are you ready for this? I cut my hair because I prefer it short.
Revolutionary, I know. But I usually have to argue my case when someone is commenting on my hair. It’s shocking how often I need to explain my choices.
Here’s how I defend myself: I feel more confident with short hair. Long hair weighed me down both literally and figuratively, and it’s so thick that I can’t wear it up without getting migraines. Long hair exacerbated my skin picking and the acne that frames my face.
Although, why should I have to "defend" my hair in the first place?
My hair regrets
A big regret I have about my wedding is that I spent three years growing out my hair. I spent years feeling miserable and uncomfortable about the awkward transition lengths, just so that I could have long hair for our big day.
In the end, I pinned it up. So those years I spent growing it out to down the middle of my back were futile.
I grew it out because I thought that’s what brides were supposed to do, and because I was told to not have short hair for my wedding. Neither of those reasons hold much weight with me now.
Then when I finally felt free to cut it, I was barraged again - did you donate it? What a shame that you didn’t. What is with everyone's obsession with each others' hair?
There’s a lesson here
First of all, I’d love to recommend that every woman give short hair a try in some capacity. I love the freedom and confidence it brings me. Think your face isn’t the right type for short hair? You’re wrong.
If you’re a human, you have the face for short hair.
That being said, if it’s ultimately just not your jam, then go ahead and do whatever you want with your hair. You don't need permission. Shave it, grow it down to your knees, dye it your favorite color. This all reminds me of that Dove commercial about expressing yourself that I may have made me tear up a bit.
Just don’t let anyone tell you how to wear your hair because that's the way it's "supposed" to be. You deserve to be exactly the woman you want to be.